Bingo Jokes

Have a laugh with us at some of the jokes Mecca Bingo players have sent in. Don't just read them though, join in the fun! Whether it's your own joke or a funny joke you've heard recently and want to share, we want to hear from you!

Her are some of the best and worst of what our Mecca players have sent us, send us some more to keep the giggles fresh!

3 sisters aged 92, 94 and 96 lived in a house together. One night, the 96 year old draws a bath. She puts one foot into the bath, pauses and yells to the other sisters "Was I getting in or out of the bath?" The 94 year tries to go and help her. Halfway up the stairs she pauses and yells "Was I going up or down the stairs?"

The 92 year old sitting in the kitchen shakes her head, knocks on the wooden table and says "Touch wood, I hope I never get so forgetful." A second later she shouts out to the other 2 "I'll come and help the both of you as soon as I see who's at the door!"

What's the difference between snowmen and snowladies?

Snowballs!

How do you get a hundred cows in a barn?

You hang up a bingo sign!

Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband, "I bet you don't know what day this is?"

"Of course I do," he indignantly answered, before going out the door to work.

At 10am, the doorbell rang and when the woman opened the door, she was handed a box containing a dozen long stemmed red roses. At 1pm, a foil wrapped, two pound box of her favorite chocolates arrived. Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress. The woman couldn't wait for her husband to come home.

"First the flowers, then the chocolates and then the dress!" she exclaimed. "I've never had a more wonderful Pancake Day in my life!"

Betty and Hilda, 2 friends, went together to play the slot machines at their local bingo hall. Each agreed that when her allotted money was gone, she would go to the front of the bingo hall and sit on the bench to wait for her friend. Betty quickly lost all of her money and went to sit on the bench. After what seemed an eternity, she saw Hilda coming toward her carrying a huge sack of coins.

"Hey Betty," said Hilda, "How'd you do?"

"Well Hilda," said Betty, "You see me here on this bench - what do you think? Looks like you hit it big though."

"Oh yeah!" said Betty, "Did I find a good machine! It's way in the back. I'll show it to you - you can't lose! EVERY TIME YOU PUT IN A DOLLAR FOUR QUARTERS COME OUT!!"

How do you sink a submarine full of blondes?

Knock on the door.

People say you have to stay in shape, my grandmother started walking 5 miles a day from when she was 60.

She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is!